领悟

我知道了，不是所有事情都能够勉强。我必须沉淀下来，认真地思考和决定。

1

重新回来这里 重新看回朋友们的部落 

住在同一个屋檐下 我一直以为 大家都在变

原来 不管在我看来变化多大 那颗赤子之心 有时感性有时直肠直肚的个性 还在那里

而我 却因为现实的磨练 把曾经单纯的心给埋没了

谁

当你发现，对她们来说你没有很重要的时候。

Untitled

Guess it's time to update bits of my life here.

The most impactful event will definitely be the passing of my grandma.
Every now and then, when I was in the train, in the room, in the office, and whenever I thought of her, I will still teared a bit.
Not only that I miss her, I hate myself for not being with her when she's sick.
The last time I saw her is when I was about to go back to Singapore, I was holding her hands and hesitated whether I should give her hug.
In the end, I thought I should give her a hug the next time I saw her.
And then, there was no next time.


The impact is permanent.
Until now, I still couldn't forgive myself for being such an ignorant grand daughter.
My grandma had always asked my mum about the three of us, concerned about how I was doing in Singapore.
But, I had never ever asked her once whether was she unwell, or a simplest how are you.
Regardless of the communications barrier, my grandma would try her best to communicate with us.
And she would try her best to understand what we were talking about.
Our communication was very minimal and limited, only revolved around food work and stuff.
I never think that I'm a very good grand daughter, but I didn't realize how ignorant I was towards my grandparents until she's gone.
There will not be chance anymore. What's left is only regrets.

Happy 22nd to myself

The title says it all.
This day went exactly how i wished for - peaceful and grateful.
I do not demand everyone to wish me on facebook wall, nor held a grand celebration for myself.
It doesn't matter, really. As long as the people that I cared for remember my birthday and wished me.
That's good enough. Although not all of them did, whatever, anyway.
As long as I have expressed my love to the loved one, kissed my mum, hugged my bro, teased on my sis and thank my beloved friends for the treats, presents and wishes.
I should be contented enough.
 

However, it was indeed the toughest birthday I have ever had in my life.

Given the fact that my grandma just passed away a week ago.
I don't have the mood to celebrate at all, same goes to my family.
Grandma's incident gave me the shock of my life, and our family is still miserable about the loss.
How long more does it need to recover? I don't know.
As the saying goes like, "Time heals almost everything. Give time, time."
It made me realized that life is so short and so vulnerable.
Your life can be taken at anytime in just a second.

So what if today was the last day i lived, does it matter if he/she didn't wish me happy birthday?
Does it matter if i never receive many gifts?
Does it matter if i have not had my own party ever in my life before?
Does it matter...

It doesn't matter at all.

What matter to me the most is that my family and my loved ones stay beside me healthily.
We cheer each other up, impact each other's lives, and create happy memories in each other's minds.
Happiness is the most powerful tool in the world, much better than any feasible things like wealth.

Thanks to everyone who have impacted my life for the past 22 years.
I am still a happy girl. :)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY.

啵一个

 

那个伤到脚还要一拐一拐地搭巴士送我回家的男人

让我亲一下好吗 ♥