我回来了

回来了。
离开了一段时间，因为统考。
原本这一篇，应该我在考最后一张paper的时候想到要写的哪个东西。
只是，一打开blog就看到一些不愉快的事情。




我不像别的博客，真的可以做到
视而不见，听而不闻。
因为我就是没有用的人，还是会受他人的影响。
还是，需要一点时间来适应
人类的尖酸刻薄，冷言冷语，说话一味地从自己的立场出发。
我开始真正领悟到了。




曾经，我也是这样的人。
不知天高地厚，唯我独尊的小伙子。
不知道是不是人老了，想的东西也会变得复杂。




你在做一件事情的同时，根本没有想到人家对你的回响有多大。
所以啊，多虑多烦恼，少虑又惹麻烦。
我可以真正感受到那种无奈。
那种人与人之间，无法妥协，无法谅解。




我又上了宝贵的一课。

p/s：明天要去看MJ。不晓得大家会不会为自己的偶像一起欢呼呢？想太多了。

最后一次。

中学生涯的最后一次。

我     要     拼     了     

see ya two weeks later. Date me!  =)

I feel luxury in mental ♥

ANTI CHILD ABUSE

Today is the voting day to elect a new leader for mca between ONG XX and CHUA XX. I am totally clueless about their fightings. I have no idea and not interested at all whether who is the protagonist or antagonist. Fight between people from the same race huh? This is the most dumb thing i'd ever seen.


While these people are struggling for their high-powered, take a look on the world's highest rape rate which is America. Look at the shocking rate. Can you imagine those kids are actually encountering the danger of being mollest and seduce every single day?


Local child protective service agencies identified 126,000 children who were victims of either substantiated or indicated sexual abuse; of these, 75% were girls. Nearly 30% of child victims were between the ages of 4 and 7.


- Department of Health and Human Services, Administration for Children and Families, Child Maltreatment, 1995.
 
 
When a six-year-old girl is raped over a four year period by a 34-year old man, and that man gets all but 60 days of his prison sentence suspended, there is no justice system.


Now yesterday, Vermont Judge Patricia Zimmerman sentenced a guy who cursed at her, Ralph Page, to 60 days in jail. So here's Vermont justice. Curse at a judge, two months. Rape a six-year-old, two months.( What is the value a human's life then? Ridiculous )




 
This is how insane things are now in Vermont, America. This newspaper believes long prison terms for child rapists accomplish nothing. Somehow I thought protecting kids by keeping vicious child predators locked up is the only way to keep these villiains from abducting another victims again. Some of the mollesters are sentenced to rehab, and most of them still walking freely on the US street.
 
 
Oprah is urging the americans to pay more concern by repeating "This is our country, Americans."
I am not an American, somehow this issue is very serious. Its about the kids being raped, being tortured. Its about the kids future. How these happenings could affect them mentally in the long run. 
 
 
Like Shawn Hornbeck's case, people start to question why is this kids never escaped when he got the chances? Many perspectives. In my view, these kids would surely beaten up or mollested more whenever they tried to find way to escape. To save their own lives, they need to obey. In the mean time. Well im not in their shoes and am not eligible enough to make any judgement. As what Oprah had said :
 

See? Isnt our country's leaders fightings with each other is truly meaningless compared to this scenario which is happening now?

 

 

Para leaders, rather than having slogan of  "Rakyat Diutamakan", do something but not demogogue-ing in front of people. See those kids? They need help. We too. We dont wanna live in a country with negative political image.

 

ANTI CHILD ABUSE

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I feel luxury in mental ♥

出走

郁闷。郁闷。郁闷。

最近，常常感觉到一股闷骚。
之前一直出去，有种逃避考试、逃避念书的意念。
然后呢，狂疯了以后，面对的却是莫名的空虚感。罪恶感。
翻开书本，竟发现自己的心不在课本，要花上好一段时间来集中精神。
这种应考心情，真的很遭。


回到学校，朋友们都已经进入非常状态。
我有做东西，我有复习的，但是
为什么
在她们的面前我就似笨蛋那样。
即使一天24小时不眠不休，
即使很仔细地去复习每一章每一节，
但是在她们的面前，
就好象我什么都没做，
就好象我一直在颓废着，渡过废人的日子。


我觉得自己开始称不起身边的人，
明明自己就是笨，一个概念往往要人家解释几次才搞懂。
还抱什么佛脚啊？
事实根本不会改变!


原谅我这段时间不想开口说话。
原谅我这段时间的脾气很暴躁。
原谅我开始语无伦次。
原谅我无法专心听你说话。

心啊

流浪去了。

I feel luxury in mental ♥

Are you proud to be a BANANA?

Well, i'm sure many of you understand the meaning of  'Banana' .
Its actually used to describe chinese people who are unable to speak their root lang.


I knew the meaning of this word when i was 13. That time i went loitering in my mum's office and one of her collegues asked me if i were a banana and thus explained the word to me. He said its chineses' responsblilities to pick up with their mother-tongue. He asked me not to be like my mum who speaks english and have no idea about writing her chinese name at all. Well, at least my mum is improving as she can easily speak mandarin now.


Back to the point. So to me, this is definitely very sarcastic and i dont think people like it when they're called as 'banana'. However, that was the past.


Last week when my sister attended her class, she get to know this girl who is banana. The conversation of theirs which told by my sis really shocked me.

Sister                   The girl

"Hi, where do you live?"
"I stay at Pandan Indah."
"Ooo, i thought the people over there cant speak english. How come your english so fluent?"
( means we are low standard. is that what your trying to say, miss? )
"Oh, family influence." (my sister had no patient to talk to such arrogant person )
"Ohh, me too. I live in damansara. I speak english with my family and friends. We do not speak chinese. We are banana you know?"
"Oh oh oh..."


Have you notice the sentence goes like this "We are banana you know" ?
I guess you know what the hidden meaning. These youngsters are really PROUD to be a bananas. I was freaking shock! They dont feel a single shameness at all. Is that because they look down on their own culture and thought they are 'upgrated' person compared to those who speak chinese?


Obviously, if chinese dont speak their own language, i wonder how the hell this chinese culture with the age of over 5000 years could survive then? If chinese dont appreciate the chances they get in touch with chinese, to love it, feel it and live it, definitely they're digging the grave for their own culture. Though we live in Malaysia, the opportunity of using chinese is actually very limited.


I feel proud of my mum. Even though she has no idea in chinese matters, i'm glad that she sent me to chinese private school to experience the beauty of it. Now who says students in chinese school cant speak well english? It seems that everyone notice the importance of the international language and even chinese school's students are practising now.


In my point of view, if you could strongly pick up with a multi-lingual, then you are eligible to 'sai meng' to others. But what do you have now? RICH AND SPEAKING FLUENT ENGLISH, thats all?

If you concern about latest news, i'm sure you'll read about the rapid growing of China especially in business industry. Stop dreaming in your own castle. Accept the truth that your no longer the one who being eliminated if you retain this conservative thinking. Soon, chinese will become one of the international languages.

You might be thinking that since i'm fully support chinese, why'd i still write my blogs in english? As what i've said. I do work hard to improve it and eventhough we're not good enough but we definitely not the losers in future. I speak chinese in school, at home and in my blog my speak both.

Take time to realise. Learn more languages is really beneficial in future. Dont waste time living in your own dreamland.

Woah, i've written a lot man!

Guess its time for me to do revision as i have merely 2 WEEKS TIME to prepare for the coming exam.

While your chasing for better tomorrows, dont ever forget where you came from.

p/s: Are you proud to be a BANANA?

I feel luxury in mental ♥

What a bright time its the right time to be optimistic

I feel great actually.
Or am i just hiding my sentiment?


As i would go on with my extremely busy daily schedules. Even my time is all packed with books and studies. I've not been blogging for quite a long long time. Since im going to have the last + most important + the only UEC (United Examination in Chinese School) in two or three weeks later. However I couldnt even memorize all chapters in fact i still need those notes while im doing accounting. Gosh.



The trial exam, i got a suck result. Totally. Hopefully it wouldnt affect my confidence after all. Yesterday i actually squeezed out an hour to attend yoga class. Everyone was shocked to see me as im truly not in a good situation compared to before.

"I'm FAT."

"My face started to grow a lot of pimples."

"I am consuming without calories-concern."

"I sit and study immediately after my meals."

"I skip doing treatment for my hair and its like dry bushes now that split out whenever they want."

"I have no credit for my phone so cant get encouragement from my babe." ( okay. this point is not related )

So you can roughly imagine how horrible i am?
I hate it when i look like a pauched old woman with the tummy giggling around.
What goes around comes around.
I can only accept the truth that my wonderful time is ending sooon =(

At least, let me taste my favourite mooncakes first before i was called to hell.

P/S: How long you've not been celebrating this festival with your family?

I miss lantern =)

I feel luxury in mental ♥